Monday, October 18, 2004

An Open Fucking Letter To Wall Street Regarding The Motherfucking Election

An Open Fucking Letter To Cock-Sucking Ass-Fucking Wall Street Regarding The Motherfucking Election

Date: 2004-10-13, 7:45AM EDT first fucking draft (author's note: this post began life as a Craigslist post, which is why it starts like it's talking to somebody else, because it was, I went ahead and repurposed it here.)

Dow Jones (symbol: DJIA) Striking Distance Watch:

09/10/01 DJIA closing: ..9,605.51

10/15/04 DJIA closing: ..9,933.38

10/18/04 DJIA closing: ..9,956.32........up......22.94 points
10/19/04 DJIA closing: ..9,897.62 ..down.....58.70 points
10/20/04 DJIA closing: ..9,886.69 ..down.....10.69 points
10/21/04 DJIA closing: ..9,865.76 ..down.....21.17 points
10/22/04 DJIA closing:...9,757.81...down...107.95 points

10/25/04 DJIA closing:
..9,749.99...down.... 7.82 points
10/26/04 DJIA closing:...9,888.48........up.138.49 points
10/27/04 DJIA closing:.10,002.03........up.113.55 points

Do the motherfucking, cocksucking MATH mutherfuckers.

Getting a little fucking close for comfort, inn't?

The BushCo. issued Kool-Aid you greedy fucking fucks must be swilling down and passing around there on your pinewood floor must be as good to you as Amber Fry's pussy was to Scott Peterson.

Hope you fucking find out it was fucking worth it you fucking cocksucking fucks.


Is this thing on?

Let me clear my throat!

Some voices got treble....!
Some voices got bass......!
I've got the kind of voice
That's in your FACE!!!!

Hey, like, what the fuck ever.

If the best you can do is call me names when I nail your ass, (this piece began life as a response to a Craigslist posting), when I'm just trying to get you to see reason and logic, then I know you're nothing but a pathetic little joke, and I'll treat you as the backwards child that you are.

Think of it as my 'liberal dumbass' approach.


So I fucking fudged the numbers a little bit on the high side about how the Stock Market averages at least a 10% a year increase, overall, to make my fucking point.

So fucking what?

Who the fuck on Wall Street worth their fucking salt hasn't fucking done that?

I know I did when I werked there pushing modern day snake-oil in the form of mono-clonal antibodies out the door for the firms I werked with, taking money from widows and orphans.

Did pretty well, but I saw enough shysty shit there that made it clear to me that this wasn't going to be for me over time.

I value my freedom a bit too much, so I let my Series 7 and 63 lapse, probably while you were still in Middle School, motherfucker.

At least I can still can get them back.

I haven't been barred from the Securities Industry For Life like a bunch of folk I used to share a desk and Bloomberg with.

All that aside, my basic fucking point remains, the DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

let me repeat that for those of you in the audience that are hard of hearing:

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

The DJIA hasn't BUDGED a motherfucking INCH in the 3 years since September TENTH, 2001.

No matter how you slice it, spin it, chop it up and dice it, that's a fucking FACT, Jack.

Put a quarter in your ass, because you played yourself.

And it's highly unlikely, given George's track record, that it's going to move north, anytime fucking time soon.

You know this, I know you do, you're just not fucking man enough to fucking admit it.

That makes you a fucking coward.

That must be some fucking kick-ass Kool-Aid you guys are passing around down there.

That's OK, I don't fucking want any.

I value my fucking mental health.

Being delusional, as everyone can see, and fucking does, is probably your greatest fucking strength.

Sumner Redstone owner of CBS News w/Dan Rather & MTV via Viacom, (symbols: VIA & VIA.b), must have had him a healthy pull offa the jug, I mean here's a man who just endorsed Bush by saying:

"I look at the election from what's good for Viacom. I vote for what's good for Viacom. I vote, today, Viacom."

Excuse me?!?

Dude, are you in the least bit in touch with reality?

Have you seen the fucking shellacking VIA & VIA.b has taken since January 2001?

What the fucking fuck?!?!?

As far as the "crash" on September 17th, 2001 went, you guys kind of over-reacted a bit don't you think?

No doubt that this was a catastrophic, tragic event, (as a Native New Yorker, born and fucking raised on the Isle Manhattan it affected me personally and deeply. Still does to this day. If I see one more fucking commercial for silver coins minted out of the wreckage running on the fucking FUXX "News" Channel exploiting this for $$$$$ I'm gonna start smashing my TV's and BOYCOTTING every single last advertiser on that so called-network and tell everyone I know, starting with Michael Moore, to do the fucking same. I haven't seen anything as low as that ad in my entire fucking life. Update, this just fucking in: they, the slimy fucks, fucking LIED about the Ground Zero fucking SILVER fucking PLATING and are under INVESTIGATION for fucking FRAUD, how fucking PERFECT), but no fucking way you clowns should have let things go down to that level.

That WAS retarded.

Another approach which you could have taken was to say,

"Hey, this is bad, very fucking bad, but we're the Strongest and Mightiest Nation in the History of the Werld and there is no fucking way we are going to let this grievous loss rattle our cage and bring us down.

Not only no, but...

Fuck NO.

We're going to honor our dead by making sure the market goes up and stays there.

Fuck YOU very much Osama!"

But no, you didn't.

That's about as weak as it gets, and a real disservice to those that died that day.

Wait a minute....

I'm fucking WRONG here.

Let me back up.


There was NO fucking quote "crash" un-fucking-quote on 09/17/01.

You fucks, I don't fucking believe what just fucking came to me.

Holy fuck.

I know WHY the fucking market took a fucking swan dive that day, and it wasn't a few rogue Al-Qaeda operatives with fucking "inside information" that shorted UAL that "crashed" the fucking Market....

It wasn't rapper KRS-ONE that defiled their memories, as you would have it, you scumbags, what horseshit that is.

No, no, no.

Fuck NO.

It was YOU.

You greedy, traitorous, slimy, evil, greedy, pig faced, I hope your wives and girlfriends leave you, your kids run away, your parents disown you and you rot in hell, you cocksucking pig FUCKS.

You went motherfucking SHORT when you could have fucking went LONG.

You did it on fucking PURPOSE.

Holy fucking shit.

You fucking BETRAYED every last one of those people.


Because you greedy fucking, motherfucking, cocksuckers all dog-piled in fucking frenzy to get as much as you can as quick as you can and TO HELL with everyone else.

You SOLD OUT every fucking person that died in those planes and in those Towers that day because you wanted to make a QUICK FUCKING BUCK.

That's why the market quote "crashed' un-fucking-quote.

Their BLOOD is on your fucking hands, all for a dollar.

You fucking people.


I've never been so fucking disgusted in my life, I can't fucking believe I just realized that just now, I am going to be so FUCKING sick, I won't be able to get food down for a fucking goddamn week thanks to you fucking fucks.

So, fuck you, Wall Street.

I started questioning your judgement from that day forward and so far you guys still haven't unfucked your fucking selves.

Have you?

I don't trust you anymore like I once did, and I really want to and everyday I keep hoping that you'll start doing something right.

But you don't.

Instead you give us Enron, complete with Kenny-Boy himself, better known today in the Bush WH as 'Kenny-Who?,' (nice show of loyalty, right down to the last with you people, eh?) MCI, Arthur Andersen, Tyco, complete with the fat pig-fuck Dennis Kowslowski, (ugh, nasty man, my friends have standing instructions to take me out back and shoot me if I ever fucking let myself go like that), and Adelphi and a whole host of others that continue to violate the sacred trust we American's have placed in you.

You have a chance to fucking fix it.

It's simple and no one will fault you if you say:

"Since this guy, George, isn't werking out like we thought he would at first, we're gonna recommend that we all fire his ass and give this new guy a try.

He certainly can't do more damage than what we've seen here, and through his wife and her billion dollar pile, he's got a FUCKING VESTED INTEREST in making sure the Market stays healthy."

That wouldn't be a hard thing to do at all.

Get a clue, you.

This isn't rocket science

Or brain surgery.

OK, I'm not going to fucking argue with you people anymore.

I've found a way out of this polemic that you'd like to keep us in, and at most I'm just going to make fun of you and mock you and get right up in your faces and laugh at you.

But fight anymore?

No fucking way.

Total waste of my time, and I value my time much more than I do my money.

You should too, since you can always make your money back.

But nobody in the history of man has ever gotten a single second of their life that they lost back.


You guys are sick and like I don't get mad at someone with cancer, so I'm not going to get mad at you anymore, as much as you feed off of that.

So sorry, I'm fucking done playing that game.

Find somebody else.

I'm going to pass this message, approach and attitude to as many people as possible, because my sense is that they're just as worn out by this as I was.

As far as being a 'liberal dumbass' goes, bear in mind that I've been a Registered Republican my entire voting life since I was 18, you fucking ignorant fucking fuck.

You guys just fucking love to fucking talk smack about shit you don't know fuck about, don't you?

That's for the last 22 fucking years, that I've been a fucking Republican,I turned 40 this year, so you do the math.

I know you can, it's not that fucking hard, now is it?

The first President I voted for, to my now later regret, due to the damage I see that he's wrought on this society, was Ronald motherfucking Wilson Reagan.

(I pass by his 'legacy' everyday on every street corner of this city, my Nation's Capitol when I see the way we treat the most vulnerable people in our culture that should have never been tossed out of the mental hospitals in the first fucking place.

Total fucking DISGRACE.

That's pretty fucking shameless, which is about right, since you guys have no sense of shame.)

Yesirree Bobbie, been a Republican my whole and entire fucking life, that is up until yesterday when I confirmed that my registration as a proud, card carrying member of the Democratic Party went through.

You wanna know why I switched parties?

I'll tell you.

To borrow a phrase,

'I didn't leave them, they left me.'

You can thank George for that.

And I know for a fact that I'm not the only one that's doing this, there are hundreds of thousands, if not a couple million that have done this this year.

So put a quarter in your ass, cuz you just fucking played yourself.
So put a quarter in your ass, cuz you just fucking played yourself.
So put a quarter in your ass, cuz you just fucking played yourself.
So put a quarter in your ass, cuz you just fucking played yourself.

See, all the anger and hurt and rage left my body last Friday afternoon when all of a sudden I realized a couple of things about you guys.

All present evidence to the contrary, you are at about the end of your 12 year run.

You just haven't realized it yet, and by the time you do, it'll be too late.

It won't even matter if Kerry wins the election or not.

Nope, not at all.

First thing, if Bush does get re-elected, I know you guys are going to hit the pipe as hard and fast as you possibly can, so there will be burn out on your end.

And the good thing is, if you do that, then the lessons will REALLY stick this time, and then it will be a long fucking time before the American People let anyone run rough-shod over them again like this.

See, thanks to everything you guys have been doing since you came into power back in 1994 has had the unintended consequence of making the Democratic Party stronger than it has ever been before.

And make no mistake, we are, and we are coming up from behind in a really big way.


I'll say it again.

The Democratic Party has NEVER fucking been STRONGER than it is today and we're growing EVERY fucking DAY because we believe in something you don't.


And you?

What you're doing?

You're fucking merchants of death, and you fucking EAT YOUR OWN, to boot.

You woke us up, and we can motherfucking guarantee you that if Bush wins we WILL be paying a lot closer attention from this point on and if you keep trying to fucking game us, we're not going to shut up and go away quietly.

That time is fucking past.

So get used to it, we're going to watching your every move from here on in.

You brought this on yourselves, so don't act all surprised when we catch you fucking up with your hand in the fucking cookie jar and do something about it.

You already know your grasp is tenuous, or else you wouldn't have gone out of your way to rig the gerry-mandering Congressional process the way you have.

A confident group of people feels no need to attempt to stack the fucking deck like that, so I KNOW you're shit scared, that behavior PROVES it.

A move like that reeks of desperation and of a group that knows what they're doing is wrong and they only way they can maintain their position is to cheat like that, since they know that they're fucking with the democratic process and could never win in a fair fight.

Good for you, we're so very fucking impressed.

At most, your time in the Sun will be another 6 years, becasuse if you continue to fuck up the way you are, you're going to lose either the House or Senate in 2006.

Not even a motherfucking question.

So tread very carefully and be mindful of what you're doing because it will have consequences that you're not going to like.

Like losing the WH in 2008, or sooner, if Tex gets impeached.

Or more likely, since we're already starting to see signs of George crumbling in public, George has a complete and total spiritual, emotional and mental collapse, which given the incredible level of stress he's under right now is amazing that it hasn't happened yet.

I'll give him that, he's one tough bird at core.

Too bad he didn't decide to use his power for good, like he's had every fucking chance in the werld to, and chose not to.

If he does win, since he won't be getting the sort of break, between November 3rd and the Inaugaration, that his soul will need, it's highly probable that we'll see the breakdown by sometime in late 2005 early 2006.

I can't think of a more loving reason to hope that he loses so he can maintain his health, as one human being to another, all this pressure he's under can't possibly be good for his spirit.

Your biggest problem though, is none of that.

When the history of this time of the Republican Party is written years from now the number one thing that will be said about you guys is that you self-sabotaged yourselves by creating a brain-drain at this critical juncture by driving some of your best people out.

In other werds, you fucking morons forgot to CULTIVATE a fucking BACK-BENCH.

You don't FUCKING have one.

Not anymore, that's, poof, gone.

How fucking RETARDED is that?!?!?

And without that, a few years down the road, you're going to be fucking fucked.

By the time you wake up to this FACT it will be too late.

The damage has already been done.

The only fucking sane guy you've got left on your team is John McCain and it's a miracle that he hasn't bolted yet.

Keep trotting out Zell Miller, and I promise you, he will.

The shit you drag him through on a daily basis must be as fucking hard on him as any day he spent in the Hanoi Hilton.

Also, you're not bringing in any new, fresh blood that you're going to
need down the road, and if you want to keep the Party strong, healthy and
vital, you're going to need to do that.

Starting like oh, 5 years ago.


Oh, you may look strong and robust on the outside, but on the inside you're already a hollow shell, like a mighty oak that's been eaten from the inside out by termites.

In the Animal Kingdom, that's known as presenting.

btw, am I the only that's noticed that the werd

(The thing that Georgie panders to in every speech)



That's right, 'Al-Qaeda' means 'The Base' in Arabic and Spanish.

Make of that what you will, but if I were you, I'd stop calling your supporters 'The Base' before anyone else figures that one out.

Might be taken the wrong fucking way, or make you look bad, and I know how much you guys hate to fucking look bad.

All you guys have got left is your precious 'Brown Shirt' Base, and it's not going to grow any bigger.

More violent and psycho and crazy, sure, but it will shrink.

Meanwhile, we've got Howard Stern, The Beastie Boys, Governor Dr. Dean, Michael Moore, and that's just for fucking starters.

Scoff and dismiss all you want but all these people have proved one thing beyond a shadow of a motherfucking doubt, especially the Good Doctor and Michael Moore this year that:


We all just saw that very clearly this year, so no matter what happens on November 2nd, we have that to build on.

That makes 2004 a very, very, good year indeed.

Anyhow, if you've got any sense left in your fucking head, you'll listen to me and heed what I'm saying because as usual I'm right and you're not.

But you probably won't and you'll keep doing what you're doing and keep getting what you're getting.

Which, of course, makes you totally insane.

Can't wait to see the look on your fat little faces when this shit totally backfires on you.

We'll all be there, laughing our asses off at you, and then we'll be nice enough to drive you to the hospital to get you checked in so you can start to get better.

It's going to be your choice how long you want to maintain your illness and just how quick you want to get better.

It takes time to build.

There's a New American Society that's about to rise up that will live up to the promise of this place and finally turn it into the shining city on the fucking hill that we all fucking want and want to work towards that Ronald fucking Reagan did nothing but give fucking lip service too, and if you behave yourselves, we'll have a place for you in that society as well.

I'm getting ready for it, as is everyone I know, and it's going to be a lot of hard fucking werk, but I've spent my whole life getting ready for it and the time is now.

Keep in mind, no matter how this turns out, the *real* werk starts on November 3rd.

See you at the fucking polls you fucking motherfucking cocksucking, ass-fucking hating fucks

Friday, October 15, 2004

Re: Jude Law / Ashlee Simpson > October 23rd

Re: Jude Law / Ashlee Simpson > October 23rd

"I feel so bad my band started playing the wrong song and I didn't know what to do so I thought I'd do a hoe-down- I'm sorry."

synchbuster writing about the Saturday Night Live Ashlee Simpson Emperor Has No Clothes debacle that went down last night spoke for a lot of people out there in music land when they said:

"All I know is. I love that this happened. I hope people continue talking about it. And I hope the discussion widens to encompass the phoniness of this genre of music in general. "

And I can see that too, but I'm also thinking, why stop there?

I mean wow, isn't this just like the posturing of this BuschCo Administration?

Something bad happens, they just elide over it like it wasn't even there

Days Left Until Bush Leaves Office, Maybe, Countown Clock