The Singularity Approacheth....

"Is It Live, Or Is It Memorex?"

"Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. In a panic, they try to pull the plug. "

For the last several years it has been a running gag between me and those that know me that it's getting harder and harder to tell the difference between what we know as "Reality" and what passes for the fine reportage from "America's Finest News Source," otherwise known as "The Onion".

Nation Hoping For A Windy Flag Day

June 5, 2007 | Issue 43•23

WASHINGTON, DC—With June 14 just a week away, citizens nationwide are hoping that brisk, windy weather is in store for this Flag Day.

"A Flag Day without wind is like a Columbus Day with mail delivery: It just doesn't feel right," said Coast Guard Rear Adm. Roger Jessup, who is serving as this year's Flag Day grand marshal. "I long for the Flag Days of my youth, when the winds were always strong and steady. Seems like in the past few years there's barely been a breeze and Old Glory just droops. Except for Flag Day '02, when it was so blustery the flag whipped right around the flagpole."

Jessup, whose duties include answering Flag Day mail from the nation's children, added that if everyone tried as hard as they could to be good this week, "perhaps Starry Stripes, the Flag Day Fairy, will blow some nice breezy air our way."

Well, I'm here to tell you that today, June 14th, 2007, at exactly 5am, EST, the Flag Day commemoration here in the United States Of America, The Weather Channel led with an item about the effects that gusty winds will have on the Stars And Stripes that will be proudly flown today.

I don't know any other way to put this....

We're in big fucking trouble.